About
The Snitch was created by our founder and God Emperor Dale Bell in October 2019. Dale recruited many early Snitch members who remained throughout; Bill Angell, a skilled writer; Caleb Levy and Benjy Eichner, two talented editors; and Auguste Rame, the programmer behind The Snitch's website.
The Snitch went through a "dry phase" in late 2019 and early 2020, but then COVID-19 hit, which allowed us to flex our web muscles and go on a recruiting binge, leading to the awesome and larger than ever Snitch teams of 2020-2021 and 2021-2022, which included writers Wren Buehler and Nicholas Daum, editors Hudson Yon and Evan Song, and illustrators Sebastián Valderrama and Natalie Weng.
After Dale's graduation in 2021, Auguste and Caleb became Editors in Chief of The Snitch, working as little as ever.
We passed the torch to Wren, our new Editor in Chief, who maintained and transformed The Snitch into an official school news column.
This website remains as an archive of our work.
Our Alumni
Wren Buehler
Editor in Chief?
Remember, kids— you don’t have to be skilled to head a club. You just need to outlast everyone better than you.
Tali Goelman
Managing Editor
“There is no subject as juxtaposed between art and history as philosophy. On one hand, it is in touch with the exact science of historical context, and on the other, it is a subjective artistic interpretation of the way of living.” - Map R Test
Nicholas Daum
Head Writer
What they don’t know is that I’m using a vast sweatshop of monkeys to write all my articles. One day they’ll finish one.
Daviana Marcus
Writer, Editor
Writer of lanky articles.
Liv Dentoni
Outreach
We are decidedly not all in this together.
Bruno Chong
Writer, IT
This bio has been redacted by The Administration for clarity.
Sanjana Surendran
Artist?
You’ll either catch me sleeping or meticulously planning my path to world domination. Be afraid.
Auguste Rame
Co-Editor in Chief, Website Destroyer, Writer
Master of the midnight Snitch productivity hour, chronic procrastinator.
Caleb Levy
Co-Editor in Chief
When he’s not tearing up improving articles for The Snitch, he’s putting off improving articles for The Snitch.
Benjy Eichner
Head Writer, Senior Snitch, Third Wheel
Sycophant in Chief.
Hudson Yon
Managing Editor, Senior Snitch
Iä! Iä! Cthulhu fhtagn! Ph'nglui mglw'nafh Cthulhu R'lyeh wgah'nagl fhtagn!
Laurel Kane
Writ’r
Avast, ye devils, avast! What manner of strange sorcery hast awaken and did bind me to writeth for this strange and vexing journal?
Evan Song
Editor
Schrodinger's editor; I have both edited and not edited the article until it's observed. Then I just haven't edited it.
Curran Holden
Illegal Council, Very Not Senior Writer-ish
Still trying to convince people that we should adopt congressional style debate.
Natalie Weng
Draw-er
Can both doodle pictures and hold common household items. You decide.
Dale Bell
Writer, Editor in Chief, Benevolent Tyrant, and The Ultimate IB Learner
Dale Bell is a determined journalist with only one goal, which he pursues tirelessly: getting the website trending. And also the truth or whatever.
Bill Angell
Writing person
Was once told that “Theatre isn’t all there is to life.” In a dejected trance he found himself waking up in The Snitch’s office, and decided to stay out of gratitude for the staff not eating him.
Sebastián Valderrama
Baron Artist
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Grug
Art Critic
Grug am learned. Grug am have bachelor’s degree in art history from Cavern University. Do not make harmful assumption about Grug.
Dr. Reese Sessions
Snitch Chief Economics Contributor
Dr. Reese Sessions is the Chief Economics Contributor to The Snitch. He has a PHD from the London School Of Economics and is critically acclaimed for his landmark paper on 'Eating The Irish As A Solution To World Hunger.'
Jake Krillen
Snitch Sports Head
Bro, I'm only here in case a football scholarship can't cut it.
Frank Washington
Writer, Non De Plume
Dale's pseudonym.
Dr. Verman Politiczuck
Political and Historical Contributor, Eaten By Sharks
I had a PhD in political-historical studies from Diploma-Mills Online University. Also, Dale hated my name for some reason so he instructed to have sharks eat me. Unfortunate.
Chase Eastwood
Writer
A self-acclaimed journalist.