A shocking report was released today from “the land down under” (no, the other one) as sources have confirmed that the IMF will be pursuing financial restructuring focused on diversifying the economy of Hell after learning that a majority of its income is derived from its co-ownership of The College Board.

This move comes after an in-depth analysis where IMF economists determined that the flow of Bitcoin, the only monetary unit allowed in Hell, was derived from too few sources to create a viable financial system. For more on this issue, we talked to resident Snitch economist Reese Sessions:

“Now this report was very unexpected as Hell has already been diversifying its investments in recent years by acquiring large stakes with Amazon, Facebook, and those sick fucks at Pepperidge Farm. Unfortunately none of these investments have even made a dent in the overall income that Hell reaps from The College Board.”

At press time, the IMF decided to abandon its plans in Hell after being called away to stand outside a developing nation’s window with a boombox when they heard officials from China’s “Belt and Road Initiative” were meeting with the president about closer financial ties.